Jack Stratton. New Yorker, writer, foodie, poly, skeptic, dandy, daddy, switch.
Stories at
Books at
Hear me at the dirty boys reading series
Ask me anything
Tags: #myphotos, #me, #writing, #aesthetic, #facesitting, #socks


Call from my mother

  • Mom: I have to download Turbo Tax and the website says Windows or Mac.
  • Me: This is on your iMac?
  • Mom: Yes.
  • Me: ...
  • Mom: Which do I download?
  • Me: You want to know know if you Mac is Windows or Mac?
  • Mom: Yes.
  • Me: ...
  • Mom: Or do I need something else?
  • Me: Back when I was born was there any commotion in the hospital?
  • Mom: What?
  • Me: I mean, is there any question, any question at all if you are my biological mother?
  • Mom: *frustrated sigh*
  • Me: Your iMac is a Mac. Use the Mac software, for your Mac.
  • Mom: Was that so hard?
  • Me: Harder than you could possibly imagine.

Tags: #techsupport #childsupport #halp